In January, amidst the chaos of being newly home with two adopted children, recovering from an extended hospital stay, and in full throttle mommy-hood, I read a book that reawakened the little girl in me who dreamed of becoming a writer. As I closed the back cover, I made a decision to say yes to the hankering in my heart. That same afternoon, my author pal, Ashleigh Slater, posted that she was looking for guest posts for her webzine, Ungrind. Heavy with both bravery and reluctance, it was the first writing door I knocked on.
Totally a newbie at article writing, I asked for a topic. "Write what is on your heart," Ashleigh responded. Looking up, I saw four year old Eli sitting across from me tracing the letters in his name for the very first time. It was an easy to miss, yet monumental, moment for him. Some reflection, keyword strokes, and editing later, Written in Heaven was submission ready.
Before hitting "attach" on my email, flood waters of doubt raged through, causing me to consider a total rewrite. Or, better yet, maybe a scrapping of the idea of guest posting all together. Who was I to think I could write anything beyond a family blog?
Thankfully, I took risk. And, no matter if it was ever actually published, I had scratched a long ignored itch.
Weeks later, article forgotten, Mark and I sat heavy hearted in a hospital waiting room while Eli's sister, Evelyn, also home only two months, had bladder surgery. Our family's first major surgery, we felt raw with weakness imagining our girl on an operating table. Anxious for distraction, I scrolled through my phone, and up pops a graphic with my own words on it. They were my first "published" words.
My God is the God of details, and in that moment, as tears landed on the screen in my hand, He spoke directly to me about His presence.
Rereading my own words, I was reminded that words matter. Words lift. Words have the power to "churn out encouragement".
Our names are written in heaven though, so surely God’s got a plan for us. Surely His redemption work didn’t stop on adoption day. Our God is Yahweh, after all, which means LORD and indicates an immediacy, a presence. He’s actually in this with us, and His bigness covers my weakness.
God could use my words. In fact, God did.
Ungrind mission is "to churn out weekly encouragement by being honest and transparent about our struggles, but in a way that inspires hope, faith, and perseverance."
So now, each month, I sit with my laptop and ask God to do some churning through me.
My posts so far:
Served: A Mary to Martha Nudge
A Time to Laugh
Bending Low to Build Up
My gratitude overflows for Ashleigh Slater, author of Team Us: Marriage Together, who answered the door when I knocked, and now generously creates a space for me to share and grow. (She patiently edits through with my grammar and spelling weakness as well.)
"Like" the Ungrind FB page to never miss a post.
This is day is 9 of a 31 day series: "Tending to the Writer in Me"
No comments:
Post a Comment