Comparison. She's Me Monster's roommate. When I look at her in the mirror, she's equally as aggressive and ugly.
Earlier this year, I was granted the chance to contribute to two other blogs. For each month, every contributor has a due date to submit our posts. I couldn't be more grateful for the opportunity to be used to speak encouragement into the lives of others, have my writing read beyond the circle of my parents and best buds, and be stretched creatively to write in the style of an article.
We tattered humans have a way of squeezing a couple ounces of ugliness out of the good gifts in our life though, don't we? We get mucked up in messes of our own making. I'm going to come out of my insecure, judgmental closet and tell you that when reading the posts of fellow contributors, I sometimes find myself comparing my words and feedback.
As I am battling with a blank screen, I click onto their posts and allow myself to become blinded by their light, quickly doubting that my words have any light of their own. I open the drain and let some joy drain out.
I also find myself comparing feedback from my own articles with past articles, wondering why one got three "likes" and the other got four. Why some are shared and others are not. Constructive reflection makes me a better writer, but if I linger there, the joy drain opens wider.
My thoughts on comparison are muddled, but as I type and word follows word, the Lord gently reminds me that whether my eyes are on others, or on myself, they are off Him. So, I am distracted from the task of the moment, missing the chance to joyfully be used by my creative Maker.
How do I battle this? Prayer. When that blank screen glows white, I'm struggling, but learning to pray myself out of the way. Asking that I might release my doubts and comparison compulsion enough to bravely empty myself of one more written offering.
This is day 7 of a 31 day series: Tending to the Writer in Me
1600 bloggers are writing for 31 Days!
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