We are unofficially number one on our agency's Ethiopia waiting list,
and we are on hold.
and we are on hold.
On February 19, 2010, we applied to adopt from Ethiopia. We applied, compiled a dossier, jumped through hoops of red tape, shared the news with those we love, prepared our hearts, waited, prayed and waited some more. The image above has been on our blog and has been a tiny piece of hope throughout our journey.
Three weeks ago, we asked our agency to place our file on hold.
A referral was imminent.
What was missing? Peace.
Despite begging the Lord for peace about this adoption, it has yet to come. In the end, we just aren't sure that asking for a healthy infant girl from Ethiopia is the road were are to be on.
We are feeling both grief and relief. Africa holds a special place in our hearts. We've spent some time there, and have grown to love it, appreciate it, and need it. We have no doubt that we felt called to apply, but now we are not certain that we are called to continue on.
Did we miss something? We honestly don't think so. Sometimes God just asks us to be obedient. We have tried to do that even when it is messy and hard. Walking by faith is as necessary for adoption as are fingerprints and home studies.
We are grieving right now for a little girl we thought would sit at our table. We are grieving pushing forward as waiting parents. We are grieving the opportunity to serve a continent that we have come to love.
What we know is that we are called to adoption. To adopt again, to advocate for adoption, to support adoptive families and to fight for orphans.
A few nights ago, a wise adoptive momma reminded me that orphan care and adoption are two connected, but different things. So now we seek your prayers as we sort through which we are called to in Africa.
We are certain, but uncertain. Faithful, but weak. Will you pray for us? A road map is needed.
