Ebenezers

These are my preferred mugs.  They are a momma's mugs, filled daily with steamy, green tea.  They sit next to morning journals and Bible studies.  During naptime, they are a pick-momma up reward.  Sometimes, they sit barely warm on the homeschooling table among a mess of  workbooks, crayons, and ABC puzzles.  Sometimes, I fill them with cocoa and over the top marshmallows.  Frequently, they are discovered left in the microwave, half full, now day old, cold.  These mugs are personal to me, comforting and celebratory.

 

Each mug represents a time in my life when adoption has rubbed against my heart.  Each mug is a token from a Created for Care conference attended.  Each mug an Ebenezer, a reminder of the Lord's help in the year prior. 

Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen.

He named it Ebenezer, saying, “Thus far the Lord has helped us.” 1 Samuel 7:12 (NIV)

While retreating in March, a friend and I sat by the water, catching up on what the Lord had done in our families, our conversation mixed with giggles and the weight of the previous year.  And oh how He has helped me, and her, and every other kindred spirit, C4C momma.  She suggested that we needed reminders, Ebenezers, so that we wouldn't forget.  We laughed in awe at the towering Ebenezer that would be built if each of the 450 attendees added stones of remembrance for the miracles, provision, lavish care, and help God had given them.  He's taken us all so far. 

In 2011, my red mug was celebratory.  After sweating out a six year wait, we were newly home with Claire from China (and had a concurrent adoption in process). We were battle scarred, but the hard journey TO was behind us.  The journey WITH just begun.  My rawness was the sweetness of holding in my arms evidence of the perfection of God's timing.  She was our little, almond eyed answer to long-term prayer. 

When handed 2012's green mug, we still waited on adoption #2, but were filled with uncertainty.    We were begging for discernment about a change of course, though we'd already spent years imagining the face of our child, jumping paperwork hurdles, & longing for our little person.  We knew God would come through, but confusion was thick.   

2013 brought a blue mug.  We'd made an emotional decision to close one process, and start again with China.  Paperwork complete, it would be a month before the faces of our next two loves would appear on our computer screen.  We hoped God might give us an easy process pass, maybe that our dues had been paid, but He had plans again to drive us to our knees, ultimately off paperwork and adoption and onto Him. 

 

Then came the 2014 mug.  The fat, round pink one from this year so represents my heart.  It's wider open than ever before, and feels like it holds more, full in a new way.  For us, this year, it was adopting Eli and Evie from China in November after a long, obstacle filled paperwork battle and country change.  I was full of sweet gratitude from long awaited prayers answered. I was raw from surgeries behind and surgeries ahead, learning to fight for a little one with medical needs.  Weighted by wondering if Eli will find His voice, and if this momma can love well the four lives entrusted to us. 

 These mugs also represent the milestones of friends.   They've walked  me through my adoptions, while they walked through their own.  Together, we celebrated paperwork milestones, court dates and airport arrivals.  We showed up with tissues and cupcakes when red tape reared its ugly head, directions changed and waits lingered on. 

They are...

sure of adoption, but unsure of where that child waits,

 

 just home from Ghana with two older children,

praying about foster care,

loving a daughter in a closed country,

parenting older adoptees, seeking to make sense of hard stories,

using sign language to help their child communicate,

 awed by fundraising miracles,

shell shocked from hospital stays and surgeries,

dealing with attachment issues,

in the thick of the wait, wondering and longing. 

 

All of them experienced obstacles, doubts and long waits.  Their families large and small, first adoption or third.   Their child takes daily HIV medication or rides in a wheelchair.  Each has a story to tell of how far the Lord has brought them, and how intentionally He has helped.   Each has a cabinet filled with C4C mugs logo-ed with a momma and baby bird. 

All seems proof that God helps.  No matter the obstacle, help came.  Clearly, His heart beats for orphans.  I'm one of the older adoptive mommas now at the retreats, and I've seen Him break down barriers in adoption processes.  Seen Him move in the hearts of churches rallying around orphan care.  Seen miraculous love stories on orphanage mission trips in the poorest of countries. 

 

As I sip from my mug now, I'm reminded that God helps.  This world is messy, and orphans everywhere face the unimaginable.  But by His great grace, He uses us as vessels to make a difference for a few.  And when comfort zones are stepped beyond, we are blessed in unfathomable ways, made different by the little people we love.  We're used up, stretched out and hearts reshaped, all of which requires settling into the simple belief that God helps.   Our job simply is to be love. 

Not sure what this year will bring, but whatever comes, I'll remember that,

"Thus far the Lord has helped".

I want to show up at Created for Care 2015 used up.  A momma loving big.  An advocate fighting for justice.  A servant loving the fatherless.  A prayer warrior  interceding for orphan care and orphan prevention ministries.  A friend bringing tissues and cupcakes.  A child of God who remembers, celebrates, and tells the stories of what He has done. 

Thank you, C4C planning team, for the little row of Ebenezers lined up in my cabinet.